KneelingDrunkardsPlea

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Tell me sweet little lies.


Just got back from outside. I was finishing up a nice cigar and sipping some decent Johnnie Walker Red. It's been raining pretty hard for the last few days and decided to slack off a bit tonight. That being said, the Kneeling Drunkard has some more drinking left to do and needs to get this post out of the way.
My last post left off with a good question. Why do we accept such deplorable behavior from our politicians? The answer is easy. They give us money. Well, not exactly give us money, more like give us our money back. Money that is held from our paychecks. We will forgive anyone if they bribe us with enough money. And that is exactly what goes on with every district. Pork spending has had some renewed coverage of late. The electorate is outraged at spending lines that other congressmen put into budgetary bills. But when it gets to their district, well, that money is completely justified dammit.
This isn't my longest or strongest post, but I'm tired and angry, and let's face it, ready to get the hell off the Rock. Since the Big Kahuna guarantees a democratic republic, each citizen is granted the right to vote for a representative. You get the guy who gets the most votes, usually the guy who lies the best during his campaign. And then he is going to give you what you deserve; good and hard. The responsibility lies with the electorate to send the man with the most integrity to DC. Otherwise you will not get leadership. You will get pandering.
And if you give a damn about what the Kneeling Drunkard thinks here is what you need to look for in a pol:
1. Never vote for a guy who promises you ANYTHING on the campaign trail. He is just setting himself to break his word or buy you off with pork projects.
2. Look for the guy who says that he doesn't want to spend a career in office. 6-12 years is long enough to get something done and still remember where you came from.
3. Vote for Hemingway instead of Shakespeare. A man that can answer a yes or no question with a yes or no is rare.
4. Avoid voting for a politician for the House. 6-12 years up there will make him one.
5. Don't vote for someone who smiles too much.
6. Don't send politicians to the Senate. Send leaders. That job is too important to leave to amateurs.
7. Don't vote for anyone who is for tax cuts if they are not for spending cuts.
8. Don't vote for anyone who is for raising taxes if they are not for spending cuts.
9. Don't vote for anyone who is not for spending cuts.
10. Vote for the man that brings solutions and leadership that don't expand the size of the government.

Remember, those who control the money and the ability to raise money have the power. Guess where that authority resides?

Monday, May 29, 2006

Somebody go get the grownups...


I've had the dubious pleasure of getting to watch the US Legislature from a foreign land these last few months. Barring a little side trip to the Republic of Korea, I've had ready access to the news. Here are a few things that I have noticed:
1. Since when did a criminal investigation become a Separation of Powers issue? Last time I read the Big Kahuna there was something else called "checks and balances." Something about pitting the powers of each branch against each other so that one branch could not be checked by another branch, but by a union of the other two. The FBI (an office of the Executive) having a warrant (administered by the Judiciary) seems to trump the privacy of a congressman's office space.
2. Something is only impossible to do when it is politically hard. Sending the Armed Forces halfway around the globe for months at a time (MULTIPLE TIMES) is difficult. When the strain of these deployments is brought up to the government, they get a pained look on their face and assure us that it is very difficult. "The deployments are causing many hardships to the Armed Services. But the job must be done. No we are not just using these personnel as if they are expendable. They have performed magnificently and continue to accomplish harder and harder missions that we assign them." Sounds good right? Why is it so hard to secure the border? Are we asking too much of the border patrol? The police and federal law enforcement agencies?
3. The remoteness of a politician is equal to the product of the level of office multiplied by the number of reelections, squared. Does anyone remember anyone having a problem with sleep driving? Not falling asleep at the wheel, which I can write another post about (but I digress), but going to bed and then waking up behind the wheel thinking that you are late for a vote on the Hill. I've heard of some strange stories to get out of a DWI before, but not one to top that. Should have just claimed he was Irish and a Kennedy. That would have at least lent some credibility to his story.
4. I have to get another drink, hold on...
5. I seem to have garnered a reputation around the workplace of being some sort of wild man. Several of my junior co-workers hang around just to see what happens next. Doesn't help when my boss brings me whiskey and cigars. That being said, I'm finishing off a fifth of Glenfiddich that he gave me. It's the first good scotch I've had on the Rock. God bless that man.
6. Where was I? Oh yes. I want to be elected to the House of Representatives because of all the power that I would have. I could behave like a cave man (which I do now and have become accustomed) and it would be my RIGHT. I would be above the law. I wouldn't have to stop at metal detectors like I do now. Nothing is better than returning home from Iraq and getting searched to make sure I'm not a terrorist. Nothing is better than having three tours in Iraq and getting singled out for a search every time I get on a plane. If I was in the House, NEVER AGAIN. And I could start drinking and driving and just have the Capital Police take me home. Because everyone would know who I am. I'm going to taper off now because I am starting to sound more shrill than logical.

So what is my point? Why do I keep asking rhetorical questions? I cannot remember the last time I looked at the House (and to a lesser degree, the Senate) and thought "Where do we get such learned and respectable people such as these?" It's really getting frustrating folks. When I was a child I was taught that being a man had great rewards and great responsibility. One had to be a man and put away childish things. Responsibility and accountability were drilled in my head (thanks mom and dad). The same were drilled in by the Marine Corps. Why do we accept behavior from our leaders that we would not accept from the police, the military, or our children? I'll tell you that one tomorrow, and you won't like it...

On a lighter note, here is a pic of me and one of my best friends, Kelvin Sherman. I'm the better looking one.